Healthy grieving involves several stages, which you must go through to move past a prior relationship. If you are facing or witnessing abuse of any kind, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available. So now you are grieving not only the loss of the relationship, but you are grieving the loss of your hopes for the relationship. It was a matter of external factors or the other person's on-going issues (addictions, abuse, infidelity, etc.) which prompted your decision. This may be because while you decided to end your relationship, you did not want to. Once your heart has become attached to another person, it takes time, and some intentionality, to be able to let them go and move on. Again, that is just not how love and attachment tend to operate. You may have assumed that since you made a choice, you would just easily move on without going on feeling, “I love my ex so much, how can this be?” when you were the one to end it. It’s easy to understand why many people go on thinking “I love my ex.” But you may be surprised at the strength, or length, of your love for your ex if you were the one to end the relationship. You might be left constantly thinking about your broken heart and what went wrong with the relationship with someone you loved deeply. Trying to move on is even more difficult if you were not the one to choose to end the relationship. There is an extent to which your on-going love for your ex may be completely natural, understandable, and evidence of your genuine love for the other person. But they can interfere with our ability to let go and move on when the relationship is over. These are pretty important features of healthy love when we want a relationship to stand the test of time. Healthy love includes caring for the other person unconditionally, sacrificially, and selflessly.
While it may seem quite easy to affix them to each other, breaking that connection is much more difficult, and intimate connections and leftover feelings take time to change. When you genuinely love someone, you become attached, almost like two pieces of paper glued together. Love and attachment simply do not make a clean break when relationships end. It is totally normal to have lingering feelings and keep on thinking, “I love my ex,” for some time. Just because a relationship ends does not mean that your thoughts and feelings end abruptly. Understand Attachment. First, it can be very helpful just to understand something about attachment and love.
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Moving On Is Not Impossible - Sign Up How To Move On Even When You Still Love Your Ex
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